Day of accomplishment....I think?

Woke the fuck up to an awesome text, Titties. Great. Can life get anymore classy......why do people show me so much boob? Whatever the girl who sent it is pretty cool, I am in fact grabbing some wine and heading over to her condo tonight to have some dinner and a movie at her place. She's very intriguing. HOWEVER, I did meet her on a dating website. YES you bitches, another one. Oh what? Voice in the back of my head, did you just tell me I'm a fucking moron? WHY! Oh you're saying because the last OK CUPID date I went on I ended up marrying my now Ex Wife? Christ. I'll never learn. Well that's tonight. I mowed some lawns today with my pops, registered for SWAP because I'm a baller like that and dropped my sister off to get her hair did! Oh snap nugget! I'm about to get philosophical right in hizzy!! Coffee, Anti Depressants and boredom are really setting in....

Hello shitbags, lowlifes and CEO's. If there's one thing we all have in common, it is our love for humans. Not in the sense that stupid people due to poor choices remain below the poverty line shouldn't reproduce, but in the sense that there is in fact Love inside us all. Love is and will remain for eternity, a very multifaceted word. You can love inanimate objects, people, ideas and skill sets. What other word has accounted for more pain and suffering than love? What word has accounted for more success than love? Perhaps God or any form of the word in any language, however God is more singular and linked to a certain idea that us bipedal knuckle draggers, in our quest to explain the universe, have created this story or rather book of stories in many variations that explain both our exodus from pain to salvation, to the story of creation. You can find this linked to several post ice age civilizations, mainly in Mesopotamia. I Digress....

Love. I realized over the course of just a few weeks that I don't love just everyone. I love me. Because I have to live with who I am and the choices I make and regardless support myself in every way I must, therefore, love myself. I love my family. Without them, I would be much much much worse off. I'm not talking about my birth family, lord knows I'd be in jail or worse with their "guidance" . I love my friends. They protect me from me. They show me the meaning of fun. They accept me for me and of course boost my enormous ego much more than necessary by laughing at my jokes. And of course I would do anything for them as if they were family. I love my best friend. This, you broad foreheaded, unibrowed, limpdicks is what confounds me the most. I have never had a "best friend". I've always had several friends whom I would call my "bestie" or in Navyspeak "buttbuddy" or Armyspeak "Battle Buddy". More on that later. My bestie came from an unexpected source. And my bestie is of the opposite sex. WTF! I know, I'm just as surprised. I never expected that I could Love a woman without the same feeling as I get when I'm in a dating relationship. I love my bestie, because we have shared in so much pain already at 25 years old. We laugh, joke, play, and drink like best friends should. But just like any guy friend I've ever called Best Friend, we don't fuck. Because I don't fuck dudes. Hard. hahhaha, seriously though, I can finally say she makes me feel like a new person, like I don't have to worry and like who fucking cares just LIVE. I maintain my other best friends Danny, Justin, Joe, Tommy, Dave, Luke and Tom are in fact my best friends, but what separates them from her is they have a peginas, while she has a va j j. I spend a bunch of time with her during the week, where as everyone else works (OK not all that much time, but fuck you and the horse you rode in on!) we have fun at night! I'm sure she'll even read this but whatever. Its nice to be able to actually say without a doubt that I Love My Bestie.

B